2008

Well it is here, the new year that is. We had a low key New Years Eve & day. I am very hopeful about the new year. Even though after a loss you feel somewhat guilty about finding any happiness. I know that my Mom would want us all to be happy. I even try and think about where she would be right now had it been me that had died instead. Sick I know, but somehow it helps me. I know that she would be helping my husband try and give my kids as normal as of a life as they could. I have passed up many 1st in 2007. My dad's 1st b-day, my kids 1st b-day, my parents anniversary mom's b-day, Easter, Mothers day, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, & now New Years. All of these I have had to go through without her so far. The only things we haven't had to get through without her yet are my brothers and my b-days and her one year anniversary of the day she died. Those are all coming and I am sure we will make it fine. I am just ready to be ok again and have a good year. Its been ruff and I am sure there will be some bumps along the way. I just want to make it!